Trying To Be Holistic in a Mainstream World

I could probably make my official motto - "The easy way is not always the right way."  It certainly seems to be my theme on a daily basis when I am faced with a choice - do I do the easy thing, or the right thing?  Those easy things are always dangling in my face, and they're tempting because they're so...well...easy!  But if I've learned one thing on my journey towards a more holistic lifestyle it's that the right way is almost always the harder way, but in the end, for my family at least, it tends to be the better way.

This week's lesson comes in the form of a sick toddler.  Over the weekend Zachary came down with a cold.  It didn't start off bad - just your typical runny nose - but on Sunday he was down and out, running a low grade temp and just feeling all around cruddy.  Having a cold in this house is not unusual - with one kid in daycare, the other in preschool, and a Daddy who makes a daily trip to Boston each day, we are certainly exposed to our fair share of germs.  Easy colds get treated homeopathically, with an elderberry chaser, tougher colds (or colds that crop up just days before vacation or something else fun) require "more serious" intervention with a trip to our chiropractor, Annie.  It was clear by Sunday evening that a trip to Annie was in order.  So, on Monday morning I consulted with her to see when we could come in.  Zachary was actually seeming better, but I wanted him adjusted asap anyway.  So we went in to see her around 2pm.  He had a great adjustment, and we were on our way.  About a two hours later Zach's eye started running with thick discharge.  Anytime a mom sees that we automatically assume it's conjunctivitis (pink eye), which I did, although I also considered that the adjustment he just had may have released his sinuses, and that they were simply draining.  Zach had a bath and went to bed early.  I knew my Tuesday would be cancelled, because if he woke up with goopy eyes we were not going to daycare. 

On Tuesday morning, he did in fact wake up with a goopy eye, though not nearly as goopy as I expected.  I cleaned it off, and watched him for the next two hours.  No goop.  He reported that his eye felt "blinky" so I called for an appointment with the pediatrician anyway.

We saw the NP at 11am, and without even touching him she told me she was sure it was conjunctivitis, and also declared that he had a horrible left ear infection.  Without allowing any discussion about our course of treatment she prescribed an oral antibiotic.  I am not against antibiotics, but they are hard on the system, and I truly believe that we all have only a limited number of times that we can take antibiotics before our system rejects them.  I am already unable to take amoxicillin, and it concerns me.  After we left I took a good look at my son.  He looked good.  Yes, his eye was a bit irritated looking, but nearly as bad as the night before.  He had no fever, and he said his ear felt fine.  So, I called my team - Mom and Annie.  Mom agreed that I should hold off on oral antibiotics for now and see how he progressed, but we both wished that she had given me the eye ointment for his eye - just because we've seen conjunctivitis get really bad, really fast, and I hate playing with fire.  Annie came over to see him around 4 and agreed that his eye looked irritated.  She liked the homeopathic remedies I was giving him, and agreed that they were probably helping.  She also suggested an herbal compress, and even went to the store to buy me the herbal tincture to make them!  She adjusted him again, and agreed with my watch and wait plan.

Feeling like I had a good case, I called the doctor and asked for the eye ointment, stating that I just didn't feel like his symptoms warrented oral antibiotics in this case.  My doctor refused.  Sigh.  I know he couldn't go against the advice of the NP without seeing Zach himself, but I was disappointed with the answer.

By last night he was happy as a clam.  His eye was looking better and better, his cold symptoms were improving, and still no complaints about his ear.  He had another bath, and went to bed, but I was still anxious.  A conjunctivitis diagnosis, and nothing "mainstream" to treat it meant that he could not go to daycare the next day, no matter how good he looked or felt.  I decided that in the morning I would have to bring him back to the office to prove he was better, and request the eye ointment in person.

After a great night sleep, Wednesday morning presented me with a happy baby boy.  No eye goop at all, no complaints about the ear, and just a slightly stuffy nose.  We did another herbal compress, more homeopathic remedy, and off to take Lexi to school.  After dropping her off I drove aimlessly not really knowing what to do with him.  He was so happy, and feeling so good, but I knew I could not bring him to daycare.  So, I put in two calls to the nurse to see if I could get some ointment.  She was busy during both calls, and by the time I went to call again I looked at my baby and thought, "Why??"  His eye is fine.  He feels fine, he's resting well, playing well, why should I torture him with ointment just so he can go back to daycare sooner.  So, after a few hours at the office, we just came home for a nap.  He is napping while I'm writing.

I know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that I am treating my son in the best way for him.  But if I went back to Monday, and just picked up the antibiotics and started him on them, he would be back in daycare, and I would be at work.  It would have saved a lot of time and anxiety trying to figure out the best remedy, calling the doctor's office, calling Annie, calling my mom.  But frankly, he very well could have been worse off.  There are several studies that show that antibiotics treat ear infections no better than leaving them alone.  I'm not leaving it alone.  In my opinion, I'm treating it aggressively, but to the system I'm ignoring my doctor's advice and questioning their expertise.  And for a rule follower, that's a hard cross to bear.

It's not an easy road to travel when you make a choice to live a more holistic lifestyle.  Even when my own evidence is in front of me - the kids are sick less often, they get better faster, we hardly ever "share" illnesses, and there are no side effects to our remedies - it's still hard to have to constantly explain myself, question myself, and deal with the looks I get.  And I know I'm one of the lucky ones.  My mom, a nurse, supports me 110%, and brainstorms with me anytime I need her to, always at the ready to come over and see what I'm seeing and offer an opinion.  Annie, my friend, my chiropractor, my mentor, among other things, is so generous with her time, her expertise, and her love. And Ahren, who I'm sure often wishes I would just listen to the pediatrician and stop worrying about everything, still supports every decision I make, and always lets me know that he knows I am doing the best thing for our family.  I'm lucky, but it's still hard.  I hope that when Lexi and Zachary have children of their own my "alternative" lifestyle will be mainstream, and they won't have to struggle with it as much as I have.  But until then I will keep doing thing "the hard way" because, quite frankly, they are worth it.