Do you ever have those moments in life where you think, "I wish I could go back to my 1987 self, tap her on the shoulder, and show her this moment through a little window of time."? I had one of those moments this weekend when Lexi danced in her very first Nancy Chippendale's Dance Recital...except the more I thought about it, I couldn't decide which version of myself I would most like to show off this moment to. It sure would have been fun to go back to "Crissy version 1982", a young Chippendale Dancer herself, and let her see that someday she would be the proudest mommy in the audience while her little five year old danced her heart out on that stage. Or maybe "Crissy version 1997" in college, having my whole life ahead of me, and having no idea the joy that I was in for. But I finally settled on "Crissy version 2006", the terrified mother who was carting her young daughter from Neurologist, to MRI, to Neurosurgeon, and spending hours in tears, pacing through the house, so worried about her beautiful daughter's future. That Crissy would have done anything to take a peek through the window and know that this little angel would someday be a beautiful ballerina, dancing with the biggest smile on her face, on the same stage that she used to dance on as a child. But that's not how life works. Instead you have to live through the hard times, relying only on faith that everything will work out for the best. And maybe that's what makes moments like Saturday so amazing...remembering all you've been through to get there.
Either way, the most important thing about Saturday was that Lexi had a blast. In the weeks leading up to the recital, it was clear that she was nervous about the whole ordeal. She couldn't possibly understand what a recital was because she had never been to one, or in one. I think the unknown was making her very uncomfortable. But on Thursday we had a dress rehearsal, and as soon as she got there I could tell she was hooked. She waltzed away from me without even a second glance when the teachers came to take her class back stage. I sat in the audience feeling totally unsure of how she would react when the curtain went up, but when it did she ran straight to her spot and sang and danced her little heart out - biggest smile ever plastered on her face. When I met her backstage for the costume change she was elated. She couldn't wait to get back out there for her second number. When the rehearsal was over, it was nothing but excited anticipation of the recital in two more days. I'm not sure which of us was more excited.
On the day of the show we were both giddy with excitement. We couldn't wait to get there. Now that she knew what to expect, she just wanted to get back up on that stage and dance. I had so much fun watching her family - Gigi, Poppy, Great Gram, Grammy, Grampy, Auntie Kae, Auntie Jen, Uncle Devan, Eva, Zach and Ahren, watching her dance. I had to hold myself back from standing up, pointing to her and saying, "THAT'S MY KID!!! ISN'T SHE AMAZING???" I didn't, but she was. And I was absolutely the proudest Mommy in that audience. It was a day that I will never forget.
You can see videos of her dances, and more pictures here.
No comments:
Post a Comment